Now what’s the first thing you think about when you see a hot girl? “Wow I’d love to fuck that,” is probably a popular thought. It’s probably my first thought – that’s for sure.

Sometimes pick-ups don’t always happen they way you plan them though. Sometimes your game is off. Or sometimes maybe she just isn’t in the mood and you THINK you did something wrong when you actually didn’t. It’s dilemmas like these that make picking up chicks confusing at times and seem to not make much sense.

Rather than trying to make sense of everything though (which I understand can be difficult being a man) you can still rebound from a failed pick-up with a hot chick by keeping in contact with her and doing a lot of other great things that do wonders for your social intuition and lead to more success in the future. Personally I have benefited more from feedback from my female friends and introductions through my social circles than any cold approach skill I have ever learned.

Am I saying you should take pick-up advice from women? Fuck no. That’s like asking me for relationship maintenance advice. Whenever you consider learning anything from anyone you should always ask yourself, “Is this person QUALIFIED to give me advice on this topic?” Most women have never spend a day in their life trying to pick up another woman so taking their advice on how to proactively do it makes about as much sense as going to a doctor without a college degree.

One way befriending women CAN benefit you though is by providing helpful feedback by correcting shit you’re definitely doing wrong. If your hair or clothing style is whack, a woman will tell you the truth about it. If you try to pick up a chick and fail, another chick can probably tell you how you fucked it up. If you get last minute resistance and explain the story to a chick she can probably explain how the other chick was feeling because she can relate. Women are terrible for giving pick-up advice but great for making corrections and providing feedback. Hope that makes sense.

Another way befriending women can benefit you is by providing access to their social networks! Women, by nature, are more social than men and probably have a lot more acquaintances than you do. Probably half of my lays or more are a direct result of being introduced through another woman with whom I am friends with. The reason female introductions are so powerful is because women can relate to each other better than men, therefore if a girl tells another girl that you’re cool she’s going to believe it A LOT more than if some guy says it.

Many of you are probably aware of the “power” hot women have in nightclubs. They have the CHOICE to either talk to guys or not to talk to guys and there’s nothing (legal) we can do to change that. We can’t MAKE anyone do anything, which is why attraction is so valuable. If we want to take a walk, we can take a walk. If we want to go get some fast food, we can get some fast food. If we want attraction from a woman, guess what it’s not as easy and THAT is why we value it so much and THAT is why women at nightclubs are so powerful.

Did you know that women are accepted as currency in more countries than Visa? Well, guess what having hot women at the club with you is: club currency (as I like to call it). If you see a guy at a nightclub with 10 women around him you will probably think he has more “status” than a guy at a club by himself or with a few of his guy friends. And the REASON we think that is because we can OBSERVE and UNDERSTAND more about him than anyone else without “social proof”. Check out my article on social proof for more info. The point is that befriending women can be the difference between you being “just another guy” at a social event that nobody pays attention to and being a rock star that everyone wants to meet.

Understanding this takes empathy. Imagine you are a hot girl. Some guy you barely know introduces his guy friend to you. What are you thinking? “These guys are probably friends and wingmen and this guy is probably trying to help his buddy get in my pants.” Now imagine if one of your girlfriends you’ve known for years introduces you to a guy. You’re going to think, “Wow my friend approves of this guy SO MUCH that she’s actually introducing him to me to make me happy.” Notice the difference.

NOW you need to develop the social intuition to know whether a hot girl is better off as your target or as your friend because BOTH are great opportunities and you don’t want to fuck up either of them. Obviously “fuck her” is going to be your first choice because that’s just how we men think. If you go TOO FAR though with the pick-up attempt she’ll probably never want to see you again afterward. At the SAME time if you get in the friend zone with her you probably aren’t ever getting out and MIGHT have fucked up your only chance to fuck her.

So how do you know?

The best way to know is to know whether or not you DEFINITELY have attraction and we are all familiar with the “games” women play which makes it seem fucking impossible to tell sometimes whether she is into you or not. The reason for that is simply because every woman is DIFFERENT therefore we can’t expect them to be as consistent and reliable as our guy friends are with our behavior. Women are full of complex emotions so trying to “herd” them all into one category with a logical solution is just shooting yourself in the foot.

What is the best way to know if you have attraction? Simple.

IS SHE FOLLOWING YOUR LEAD?

The more she follows your lead the more she is investing in the interaction and the more she is convincing herself to like you. Ever hear a woman say to anyone, “Why the fuck am I with this guy?” The answer is because she has INVESTED so much in him, it would be very discomforting to know that she invested in something that failed and for her it is actually EASIER to go along with her consistent behavior than to take a massive hit to her ego.

The more a woman will follow you, the more attraction you have. Did she actually follow you to the bar to get shots when you suggested it? Did she go with you to sit on a nearby couch? Did she give you her number? Did she agree to a date? Does she text back quickly or answer when you call? Did she actually meet you somewhere for a date? These are all questions you can ask yourself to KNOW how much she is REALLY into you.

I have had women not seem to like me AT ALL but they still followed my lead. We had no emotional connection or rapport whatsoever and I still took them home and got the lays.

On the flip side I have also had women seem TOTALLY into me and then flake on me or not come back to my place when I suggest it. Well guess what, she just wasn’t that into me.

By my experience, whether or not she “follows my lead” and how often she says “yes” to my requests has been the ONLY clean cut way to determine whether a woman has been into me or not and when you look back on YOUR past experiences you will probably notice it too and a light bulb will turn on in your head.

Isn’t it awesome when things make sense?

SO the choice is up to you. If she is following your lead, she is probably attracted to you on a romantic or sexual level and wants you to make some moves. If not then she is probably just not that into you and you can gain a lot of benefits from being her friend. Obviously there is more to the “game” than just making her follow you, such as how to generate attraction, how to date, and how to close the deal, but understanding whether or not she is following your lead is a great way to determine whether or not she is CURRENTLY attracted to you, and whether you decide to keep going for that attraction or to benefit from friendship.

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Sincerely,
Falcon
Tallahassee Lair Chief

A few days ago someone asked me what my style of game was… which is a really interesting question and after I thought about it I realized my style of game is actually a lot different than most guys in the community, so with that taken into consideration here is a brief article on it.

Before I point out the trends in most of my lay reports and successful dates, it is important for everyone to realize that correlation is not causation, which by Wikipedia definition “is a phrase used in science and statistics to emphasize that correlation between two variables does not automatically imply that one causes the other.” Basically how this relates to my game is that I believe that just because I performed some action (preceding some pick-up “goal”) and then achieved that goal doesn’t mean that it was that particular action that necessarily caused that success, SO it is important throughout your journey of pick-up to never assume “this happened because of this” relationships.

For example, back in early 2009 I was running the M3 model and had some success, but that doesn’t mean the M3 model was necessarily what caused that success; it was likely just my social status, and because I had an abundance of it at the time the women probably overlooked the incongruent lines I was spilling and just wanted to be with a very “high status” guy.

For another example, if a really good-looking man types lay reports then you might be tempted to do whatever HE is doing to get laid… while what he’s doing actually has nothing to do with why he’s getting laid; he’s just a good looking dude sleeping with women who might be shallow, easy, or ugly and confusing everyone on a message board when the other members try the same things and then get confused when those things don’t work for them.

It took a long time for me to realize and really understand this concept and having this perception and being willing to admit that there is no “magic solution” to having success with any woman I want is one of the first things that has made me successful.

This brought me to the realization that no two women are the same, therefore no two pick-ups or lays will ever be very similar either because WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT. For example, if a woman who is a 5 approaches every guy who visits this website at a nightclub and says, “Hey wanna get out of here and fuck?” some guys would say NO and some guys would say YES. Does it make her good at picking up guys in general? Yep. Does that make her good at picking up the guys she wants? Nope. And she could probably sell a book on her “method” that will get other women laid, but that doesn’t mean she actually knows how to pick up one PARTICULAR man because she hasn’t treated them as individuals.

I listen to women when they talk and treat them as individuals. Rather than thinking of the next line or routine to use, I often capitalize on silence by thinking, “Hmm is this the type of woman who might go home with me tonight or is she the kind I’ll need to wine & dine first?” and deciding how to react to her reactions (some call it social intuition) is one thing that makes me successful. If a woman seems down to fuck on the same night, it would be STUPID to get her number and set up a date. Similarly if she seems like the relationship type then it would be stupid to try to sleep with her that same night. Because we men are logical machines and most comfortable with logical solutions, the seduction community showers guys with generic lines and routines but never emphasizes that you have to LISTEN to women and understand them as individuals in order to lead in an effective manner, and I feel that understanding that all women are individuals and listening to them is one thing that contributes to my success and also the success of my friends who are naturals.

Social status. Statistically, social status continues to be a trend in the majority of my same night lay, and it is often as SIMPLE as just having a mutual friend and sometimes even be as simple as her SEEING me briefly talk with some of MY friends. I don’t know WHY social status is so powerful and maybe someone is nerdy enough to research it but it just IS and something I capitalize on. It could possibly be effective because social status demonstrates that you are a social human being and have meaningful relationships with other people. At the peak of my nightlife job I was experimenting with stupid lines that would never work for most people and still had success with many women just because of who I was and what I was known for in the nightlife community (demonstration of very high social status). Nowadays I don’t have that crutch anymore, however what I do have are friends who know friends who know friends (a large social network) and when I hang out with them or bump into them during the day, at work, at house parties, at the club or wherever, there is usually an opportunity to meet NEW people who can introduce me to someone else and USUALLY there will be a hot girl somewhere along the line I get introduced to and have immediate social status.

For an example, on a recent Friday night I met a woman at a local nightclub and had sex less than three hours later at my place without even knowing her name. Before approaching her she probably saw me talking with someone (with social status) who knew her and before our interaction we already had a commonality (mutual friends). By seeing me with someone she had rapport with or who she knew had social status, she could INSTANTLY trust me more than most of the other guys at that venue.

Another example, when I used to work at a retail clothing store I met a lot of pretty girls and when we went out they introduced me to their friends and I slept with a few of them with minimal “game”. They just assumed I was a great guy by what other people said about me.

Another thing that has been consistent with my success in 2010 is honesty: honesty to MYSELF about my strengths and weakness, and honesty to others (particularly women) about who I am and how I feel towards them. Everyone has God-given and self-accumulated strengths and weaknesses and it is important to accept those and go out to meet women with an understanding of that. If you go out with a false sense of overconfidence then you aren’t going to be yourself and women are going to pick up on that. If you have confidence from your accomplishments, which is totally different, it will come off as extremely attractive to women and they will pick up on that also whether you actually mention those accomplishments or not. My relationship mentor Speed C owns his own business and is very financially successful, and although he is very modest about it, people can instantly tell that he is a genuinely successful person and before meeting his serious girlfriend he was having success with new women like wildfire.

Honesty to others is also important and possibly the underlying principle of “direct game”. Women have to deal with a lot of dishonest guys and it can be refreshing to meet a guy who is completely honest. Whether it be opening direct or throwing out a statement of intent some time in the interaction, being honest about who I am and my feelings towards women has always been a commonality in my new lays, successful dates, and relationships.

Leading is absolutely necessary with the majority of women. Women want to be WANTED and the way you show that is by showing them that you want them by leading. If you think that one day a woman will approach you, tell you you’re sexy, and suggest you go back to her place, she is probably either a prostitute or you’re head is up in fairy land.

And to quote Kenny Powers, “These are the hard realities, guys. Life is not a fairy tale, although sometimes it feels like our world is full of fairies…”

For example, Friday night when I pulled that same night lay, I led her around to about 5 different parts of the club and at the end of the night told her to come back to my place and she did. If I were some guy following most “game” rules by talking about stupid chick stuff, boring her trying to build attraction or comfort, or being overly playful all night like her GIRL FRIENDS probably do than it would not have happened.

Having fun. Every time I go out I am in a good mood and having fun, EVEN if I did not want to go out at first and my friends dragged me out of the house, because by the time I am at ANY place where hot women are present I am instantly excited which results in fun behavior, and that comes from having a genuine love for women. You have to love women in order to pick them up. We have all had bad experiences with women but that doesn’t mean that they are ALL like that. Most of us have actually had quite a few AWESOME experiences with women also and focusing on that positivity makes it FUN to go out and meet new ones! Before you go out hoping to meet women it might help to VISUALIZE your past success or meeting a super hot woman and her being super into you. Those visualizations alone will motivate you to go out and have fun and expect good results.

Some people say, “Being a dancing monkey won’t get you laid.” That is true SOMETIMES. Some people say, “Don’t drink when you go out because it will impair your thinking.” The last thing I want to be doing when I go out at night to have FUN is to be THINKING all the time like I’m trying to work a calculus problem or something. Sometimes I end up drinking too much and/or having so MUCH fun I DON’T get laid, which is FINE because I did have a good time anyway. Most naturals have the same mindset and are totally cool with going home alone if they had a fun night anyway. Pick-up should never be taken so seriously that you have to follow certain “rules” and every night is a win or a loss. If you had FUN that night then that should have been a successful night!

In fact, many nights I go out to meet women I dance like an idiot, drink a lot, and DO end up having success. I actually find it hilarious that Friday night I had to stop kissing the girl at one point because all the alcohol made me dizzy. Saturday night I ended up drinking a lot also and singing songs with one of my guy friends outside the club like an idiot and DIDN’T have much success, but both nights I had fun and didn’t take the outcome of the night too seriously, despite different outcomes. So the most important thing here is that whatever your idea of fun is, do it and forget whatever “rules” the seduction community says you should have that might prevent a good time.

So in summary, here is my “style” of game: Understand that correlation is not causation, treat women as individuals and listen to them, demonstrate social status, be honest, lead, and have fun. And always wear a condom =]

See more of them here and you can find bootcamp information if you are in Asia and are interested here