Interview with RedPoleQ- One of the Top PUA’S in Asia

I went to an all boys school, so I didn’t have the opportunity to get experience with girls and the other guys around me didn’t know much more than me, so I was always looking for information I could use.

When I came to Japan after University and breaking up with my first girlfriend, I started going out to clubs a lot and started meeting other guys who were out picking up girls too.  They weren’t using any “community” technology, but we just traded experiences and personally developed systems and learned from each other.

We were all trying to get better, and one of those guys sent me a David Deangelo article.  A few months later I ordered his Double Your Dating book, which was helpful.  But it got me only to the point where I could get any girls number.  And which girls I ended getting out on a date was a total crap shoot.

About 9 months later, another friend was reading The Game, and that’s when I really got into “the community”.

I’m not sure if I have a “dating philosophy”, but if I did, I’d say that it’s to realize that your unique life experience is what makes you valuable and if you don’t think that that’s enough, get that sorted first.

Then once you think you’re an awesome guy who can bring value to a lot of women you should learn pickup.  Having said that, I really do believe that just the fact that you’re moving forward and changing means you’re a high value male because most guys and most people are just sitting on the couch.

A lot of BAD experiences.  Every time I crash and burn, I learn something new.  Or rather I learn yet another thing that doesn’t work which leaves me with fewer options.  So maybe I have a situation, and crash and burn.  The next time I’m in that situation, I’ve now got one less way to try and handle that situation.  Hopefully, I get it right the next time, but sometimes it might take me 3 or 4 or more tries before I figure it out.

That’s what’s gotten me so good.

Not realizing that there are so many women out there that they should be a lot more focused on finding the kind of woman they want than just finding “a” woman.  Women like to know that you see them as special and unique.

This is a funny question.  I don’t think there is a “best” place.  I personally prefer clubs for meeting women, but a lot of guys prefer bars or cafe’s, or book stores.  During our boot camps, guys get experience in all of those venues.

Regardless of the place, the most important thing is that there are a lot of women to choose from.

Going out to the same places regularly, whether that means clubs, or bars, or cafe’s and knowing about cool, exciting places and events that you can invite people to is great.

I’ve personally never been that big on having a large social circle.  I don’t like to organize people, but if you’re into that, meet a lot people wherever you go(both guys and girls) and invite them out.

I remember being really envious of a lot of my friends who were naturals.  And I was involved in some unhealthy relationships because I had to take what I could get.  My first girlfriend used to lock herself in the bathroom when we had fights and use the iron to burn herself.

Now, I would never be in a relationship with this kind of woman.  Plus, it took me weeks of virtually stalking her(I infiltrated her social circle) before we had sex for the first time.  I also had some hangups about sex, because I felt bad having sex with girls I didn’t really like, but I felt I had no other options.

Now, I feel really, really lucky to be able to have the women in my life that I do.  I can really appreciate them for who they are rather than for how they make me feel about myself.  And trust me when I tell you that sex is A LOT better when you really like the girls your doing it with and find them sexy.

I’m not much of a technique/tactic guy but I guess shaking a girls hand and then spinning her is probably my favorite, especially when I couple it with putting her arm around me.  It’s great fun.

Early on I used to “peacock” a lot but now it’s pretty subtle.  The comb in my hair is pretty distinctive and gets good reactions almost everywhere I go.

Hmmm…I’ve been working on getting a threesome for the past year or so and have been unsuccessful so I guess that would be it.

Maybe Tyler Durden–his archive really broke down the micro-calibration that explained a lot of what I was seeing in my own experience but didn’t have a reference for.   But I really learned a lot more from my crew in Osaka because they were here with me everyday as we went out and figured out how to make pickup work in Asia.

Especially kino, which is hard to learn except by seeing it live and working with language barriers.

There was never a “moment”.  I always liked girls, and when I did have a chance to meet them it didn’t go anywhere, so obviously I needed to improve.

Pick a proven system, learn it and stick to it.  Go out regularly.  Experiment.  Change.  Hang out with guys who are better than you.  Watch and learn.

It depends if you mean “normal” guys who haven’t learned any pickup or guys who are already familiar with the principles.

For “normal” guys the problem is that they’re more concerned with maintaining their comfortable life than they are with going after what they want, so they blend in with all the other guys.

For guys who are studying pickup, the biggest problem is that they are afraid to open themselves up to true rejection.  They can use pickup techniques and tactics as shields to take the blame for failure rather than taking it personally.

What that means is that the techniques and tactics are dead because they don’t have the force of the guys personality in them, and that’s the real key.

I don’t really have goals for the community.  Some guys like what I have to say, and they want to work with me.  If I can help them, I think that’s great.

Personally, I have a huge list of things that would be nice, like learning to fly an airplane and going scuba diving.  But I’m not such a goal oriented person anymore.  Whatever I’m working on in the moment will build me towards my future.

So right now, that means expanding PickUp Asia to more countries, like Thailand, Hong Kong, China, Australia and Taiwan for starters, and launching The Amazing Man Intensive Training Course later this year.  I don’t really think of them as goals though.  If I want them to happen, I’ll keep working on them.  If I don’t, I won’t.

My University wanted someone to apply for the Fulbright Scholarship which is a study abroad scholarship.  The application for Japan was shorter.  I meant to get around to applying ot some Latin American contries, but I never got around to it and here I am.

Hard to pick just one.  We’ve had a 23y.o. virgin who got blowjob in the bathroom, then pulled the girl to a love hotel.  Then there was a 25y.o. virgin who was born with three fingers on each hand and 2 toes on each foot who lost his virginity about 2 months after his boot camp.

Then there’s the 46y.o. divorced guy who met 6 Chinese girls at McDonald’s while they were in Japan as tourists.  Last year he married the one in the group he wanted–she was 21 years old!  And I wish I could say this guy was good looking for his age…they moved to Houston and he’s starting a private hypnosis therapy practice.

There are other guys who after realizing they can have this kind of success with women, get a lot of confidence to pursue other goals also.  One guy quit his banking job to travel the world and pursue a stand up comedy career.  Lots of other guys have started their own businesses.

I’ve been using that name since Junior High School.  I got it from a science fiction book–so, yes, I really was a geek.  I just thought it sounded cool and have been using it ever since.

There are a lot of fundamental teachings.  Some of them we teach explicitly and some of them the students develop as they progress and gain experience.

Here’s a few though:

• Reward good behavior, ignore bad.
• You can’t control how other people react, only what you do.
• Stead effort will lead to gradual progress and ultimate success.
• Spend your time finding women that you really like and want to be with, rather than just have sex with.
• Have a plan
• Logistics, Logistics, Logistics
• Use a model–it will tell you what you need to do next, what you need to do now and allows you to troubleshoot your unsuccesses
• Become a pro at patting yourself on the back for the small successes

This is a tough one.  Because I never got into this thinking about what the dating coaches were doing.  I would say that I differ because I focus on finding women you genuinly like and having relationships rather than just sex a few times here and there.  That’s nice, too, but I’ve always preferred to be dating 4 or more women simultaneously over thrill of picking up a different chick every night.

6) Tell me about your products.